


Creature Feature

by summerartist



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man: Homecoming (2017)
Genre: Fluff and Humor, Gen, Irondad, Swearing, so much fluff and humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-14
Updated: 2018-12-14
Packaged: 2019-09-18 09:24:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,521
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16992351
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/summerartist/pseuds/summerartist
Summary: Spider-Man likes all creatures great and small but especially the unsettling ones.





	Creature Feature

Spiders

 

Tony was dozing on the couch in the main living area with only mild success. His sleep could only be described as fitful as it was sometimes whenever anything big was going down in the media or the moon phases seemed off. He really had no explanation for it except for whatever witchcraft Doctor Strange studied about the bad vibes and multiverses out of alignment that caused bad mojo.

 

Spiderling was staying over again since his Aunt had to go to a medical conference that was she had been encouraged to attend by the hospital board. Tony sincerely enjoyed having him around but right now the feeling was decidedly less so as he had been having some difficulty concentrating on anything.

 

“Hey, Mr. Stark!”

 

Speak of the devil... Tony sensed a pause as Peter saw evidence of his attempts to sleep in the unconventional makeshift bed. Tony stirred and opened his eyes.

 

Peter was clutching the Stark pad to him with excitement on his features masked slightly by the surprise of finding him here.

 

“What? I wasn’t sleeping anyway.”

 

His eyes felt gluey and crusty and he wanted to do nothing but try to rest some more but his brain was having none of it. He might as well cater to Peter in this hellish state.

 

“Have you seen this video on Peacock spiders, you know, the Christmas one?”

 

Tony blinked. “Say what now?”

 

Peter loaded up the video and a twinkly rendition of “We Wish You a Merry Christmas” played while spiders did various Christmas activities. It was a blending of nature documentary-like footage and decently animated photoshopped objects. It was obviously meant to be charming but the dancing and bobbing of the spiders brought the real purpose of their actions to mind.

 

Tony squinted at the screen a moment as he watched the disguised mating dance.

 

“You do realize that all these spiders are trying to fuck each other, right?”

 

Peter snatched the Stark pad away while looking stern.

 

“That’s not the point, it’s adorable. You just don’t understand about getting into the Christmas spirit.”

 

Tony’s eyes opened a bit more as he felt the urge to correct the assumption.

 

“I’ll have you know I developed the neuro-interface tech to my armor while blasting Jingle Bells in my workshop. Shit, I have a workshop don’t I? I make toys for all of the good little Avengers girls and boys. Okay, that sounded…” Tony frowned in forced concentration as he tried to formulate what he was attempting to say. He gave up halfway through. “…but I’ve made my point.”

 

Tony wrapped himself up tighter in his quilt and rolled over. If he could just get some more sleep before spiderling interrupted him again...  Sheesh, Christmas spiders.

 

If he fell asleep shortly thereafter it was not because Peter had brought his infectious good mood to him or that Peter had wished him a good night; It was because We Wish You a Merry Christmas was something he played on the piano for his parents during the holidays and it was something that had good memories associated with it.

 

Okay, so maybe it was all of the above but Tony did not have to admit that aloud. He may have thought about it as he drifted back off.

 

 

Crabs

 

 

Tony had long ago accepted that Peter had an unusual love of aquatic life and things found by the water. After seeing the tiny drones Tony had made for his suit he requested that he make a crab bot. He specifically requested a Ghost Crab and with relatively useless functions or at least nothing more technologically advanced than what could be contained on a phone.

 

It could play music and receive commands but as far as any stealth or miniaturized scoping functions it was essentially a dunce. Tony had no idea why he had asked for it for his Birthday but it was what the kid wanted and Tony was nothing if not good at giving people things they wanted. Well...except when it came to Pepper who was allergic to strawberries and money as gifts.

 

The point was that besides being a decoration and a portable boom box it was idiotic. The realistic movements he programmed into it held promise but Peter refused to upgrade it any more. He even gave it a name that was lacking in creativity.

 

“At least give it a more interesting name than ‘Bob.’”

 

“Oh you mean like DUM-E or U...”

 

“Leave my children out of this.”

 

Peter thought a moment. “I thought I was your children?”

 

“You were until you apparently forgot how to use the English language.” Tony flipped out his phone and started texting.

 

“Who are you talking to?”

 

“Hammer Industries. They want their tech back.”

 

“Oh, haha. You’re just mad because he’s not what you think is your best work.”

 

“He’ll end up being what I’m remembered for somehow. I can see it now, Tony Stark Leaves Legacy of Dumb Musical Robots Behind. They’ll be manufactured by the billions and available in a store near you.”

 

“That’s what you usually want with your tech though, isn’t it? Your business campaign is all about accessibility.”

 

“Access to smart tools, not decorations. And why a Ghost Crab? You could have a Japanese Spider Crab or hell even an Arrow Crab if you’re going for looks. See, now I know too many species of crabs thanks to you.”

 

“They’re...” Peter’s brow furrowed as he thought.

 

Bob scuttled sideways over to the heap of his dirty clothes in the laundry pile and burrowed under them. A fond expression settled over Peter’s features.

 

“I don’t know, their eyes just look kind of concerned and their contrasting colors seem interesting, you know?”

 

Tony did not know but if Peter was really attached to that dumb bot then he supposed he could let it carry on. It was not like Peter was out there doing drugs or binge drinking. If the worst hobby he had was adopting idiot robots then Tony could live with that. After all, it was not as if Tony was unfamiliar with the concept and if he had the same dopey smile on his face while watching Dum-E do his thing then he would make sure FRIDAY kept the footage to herself.

 

Moths

 

The sunsets at the compound were rarely spectacular given the thick treeline. One would have to drive out a ways to catch the deep oranges and golds at the skyline. Today was different, the warm hues stretched over the majority of the sky and would have seemed almost apocalyptic if not for its beauty.

 

Peter was wandering around on the grounds admiring the sunset when he saw it. The first thing he did was text Tony and then the second thing he did was take several photos of it.

 

His text summons was swiftly responded to in person a minute or two later. Tony came into view a little winded and curious looking, gaze studying the scene and not noticing what had grabbed Peter’s attention.

 

“So what is it?”

 

Tony was expecting something on a grandiose scale for Peter to have summoned him out. He really should have known better. Peter pointed at a pillar on the side of the compound with a look of utter awe on his features. Something was perched there that sat among the dying rays of sunlight.

 

“You called me out here to look at a bug.”

 

“It’s a Luna Moth, do you know how rare it is to see one in person? It’s-”

 

Peter seemed to have been rendered speechless by the sight of the green moth on the building. Tony took off his sunglasses and inspected the creature that was so enchanting to the spider kid. It was large and looked to be nearing the end of its life span if Tony knew anything about bugs. It was missing pieces of its wings and fibers of its body and something about its appearance was slightly washed out looking. It was captivating despite the damage and the way it shimmered in the sun was holding Peter spellbound.

 

“I get why people like butterflies but moths are way cooler.”

 

“Butterflies are just moths in fancier pajamas.”

 

Peter’s head turned and he stared at his mentor with utter bemusement.

 

Tony cleared his throat. “It’s something someone would say. Rhodey gave me that weird look too so don’t go thinking you’re special now just because I’m quoting other people to you.”

 

Peter was still giving him that baffled expression but did not comment further on it, instead he settled down on the ground by the pillar.

 

“I’m going to stay out here a while until it flies away.”

 

Though the thing had one foot in the grave it was fluttering its wings like it was still capable of flight. Tony could see why Peter wanted to observe it and while he wasn’t enthusiastic enough to sit down on the grass for it he went to go get chairs like a civilized person. After all, one might as well be comfortable while insect watching.

 

* * *

 

The End.

 

Please read and review!

 

**Author's Note:**

> The Christmas spider video is actually a thing and it is super cute. It’s here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HYFQQB9vqPw


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